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The Art of Asking – a commentary on an Amanda Palmer TED Talk

January 20th, 2014 | no comments

I know that one of my gifts is intimacy.. that feeling of deep connection that I feel when I am in a session with a client and even in a service conversation or sales conversation.

If you are not willing to face the parts of you that make you uncomfortable and allow yourself to move through those emotions to a place where there’s light..

Then you won’t be willing to hold space for someone else when they are going through something that is uncomfortable for them in the conversation.

What you will do instead if gloss over that part or want to move on to the next thing.. and in this moment, you just missed an opportunity to regain your power or extract power. If you’re doing this for a client.. then they miss out on an opportunity to drink in their greatness and what’s available to them in the moment.

Because hidden in all these dark places.. is the polar opposite.. Light!! Reams and reams of light..

So next time you are in a situation where you’re going through something uncomfortable Or you’re in a sales conversation and your potential client has brought up something that makes you uncomfortable..just keep breathing and ask the questions anyway.. because what lies beneath that is a depth of power – that when cracked open.. is  absolutely beautiful.

And on that theme of discomfort, I bring to you Amanda Palmer – an artist/musician who has mastered the art of asking. If you think you can definitely improve your asking muscle, then I highly recommend you watch the TED Talk. I’ve pointed out the key points from the talk as it relates to asking in your business.


Amanda Palmer TED Talk on Youtube

Click the image to play the video , if not, click this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMj_P_6H69g

What I love about this woman is  how she talks about the connection she has with complete strangers in the street as one of her previous jobs as a Living Statue called The 8 foot bride.

Why do you need to listen to her? She does an amazing job of pulling together these pieces of intimacy, connection, shame, asking for help, money. And she talks about what makes that exchange fair.

The reason I want you to study it ? I’ve been having conversations with clients about their ability to receive. The topic of shame comes up a lot. Like, is this fair? To “take someone’s money” when they might have so little.

You’re not taking or Making someone pay.. you are Letting someone pay from the exchange, the closeness that they feel when they work with you – even if it’s just one session.

Amanda Palmer raised $1.2million from  25,000 fans – she was only asking for $100,000/=

So how did that happen? She didn’t Make people pay. She Asked them. She had connected with them, shared her work.

Also she says that most people in the music industry can’t bring themselves to do this because it’s not easy. Asking makes you vulnerable.

You know why right? Because people can always refuse or say No.

There were people who criticized this woman for her gift in asking people for help and money. She was hurt because.. those people on the outside, the ones who criticized her , on the sidelines ..had No idea.. No idea of the connection that was happening, or taking place between her and her fans.

She talks about the shame associated with having a job like that of a living statue – basking.

If you need to have that relationship with your art, with your ministry where you can ask people without shame, where you’re willing to have encounters with your audience and share your work, your art, your fears, so you two can really SEE each to other, and just Let people pay you, then

Apply here for a session to speak with me about the work that we can do together. Email:nadhira@trustyourgut.com.au

I have 4 spaces left for working with me over a 9-12 month period where we can get really intimate with your gifts and the way you bring people into your world. If this is calling you – then get in touch right away.

Until next time,

Happy Asking!!

What will you ask for today?

Let me know xx

Much love



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